Guiness Bread--March 2009

So. When the challenge was announced, I was very excited. I searched for ideas, thinking I would create something truly awesome and amazing and completely of my own invention. However, as the month progressed, each day sucked harder than the next, culminating in pneumonia for me while Jay was out of town and... my dreams of loaf domination went out the window. I found myself coming back to the Simply Recipes website again and again. There was an interesting recipe for Guiness Bread with molasses that involved six ingredients. This, I could do.

The ingredients:

• 3 cups self-rising flour*
• 1/2 cup white sugar
• 1/3 cup molasses
• A pinch of salt (roughly 1/8 teaspoon)
• 12 ounces of Guinness beer
• Butter for greasing the pan and painting the top, about 3 tablespoons

* If you don't have self-rising flour, you can substitute using a ratio of 1 cup all-purpose flour, 1 1/4 teaspoon baking powder, plus 1/8 teaspoon of salt, for every cup of self-rising flour.

I dumped the flour, the sugar, and the salt into the mixing bowl, and gave it a quick toss. Then, I sloooowly added the Guinness as it mixed. See the action shot below.



When there was just a little beer left in the can, I stopped pouring, and allowed it to congeal...




Then, I added the molasses. It became a batter, like a quick bread. No kneading. Which is best, as I am a coughing machine. I don't think my family needs my germs.


Isn't the color nice? Like caramel. Next, I buttered the loaf pan and poured the batter into the pan.



Two quick sidenotes: First, that loaf pan used to have various baked-on stains that I thought were there for life. I took the pan to my grandparents' house for Thanksgiving a few years ago, and my grandfather returned it to me in pristine condition. He is a miracle worker. Or obsessive-compulsive. Maybe a little bit of both. Second, the guy who wrote the recipe on Simply Recipes strongly urges you to fill the pan no more than 2/3 of the way to the top. Please believe him. Or else you will end up with this after you bake the bread for 50 minutes in a 350 degree oven:




And you should see the bottom of the oven. Anyway, I brushed the loaf with melted butter, and hacked off a hunk.


The verdict?


It's a very flavorful bread-- I think I'll try it with a lighter beer next time. The writer suggested trying it with Harp's. But, it was very good. And so, so very easy-- took about 15 minutes from start to finish, and that was with the photo breaks. And it smells lovely. In closing, the loaf was a success. I shall end with a picture of my child.


The end.

Guiness Bread--March 2009

So. When the challenge was announced, I was very excited. I searched for ideas, thinking I would create something truly awesome and amazing and completely of my own invention. However, as the month progressed, each day sucked harder than the next, culminating in pneumonia for me while Jay was out of town and... my dreams of loaf domination went out the window. I found myself coming back to the Simply Recipes website again and again. There was an interesting recipe for Guiness Bread with molasses that involved six ingredients. This, I could do.

The ingredients:

• 3 cups self-rising flour*
• 1/2 cup white sugar
• 1/3 cup molasses
• A pinch of salt (roughly 1/8 teaspoon)
• 12 ounces of Guinness beer
• Butter for greasing the pan and painting the top, about 3 tablespoons

* If you don't have self-rising flour, you can substitute using a ratio of 1 cup all-purpose flour, 1 1/4 teaspoon baking powder, plus 1/8 teaspoon of salt, for every cup of self-rising flour.

I dumped the flour, the sugar, and the salt into the mixing bowl, and gave it a quick toss. Then, I sloooowly added the Guinness as it mixed. See the action shot below.



When there was just a little beer left in the can, I stopped pouring, and allowed it to congeal...




Then, I added the molasses. It became a batter, like a quick bread. No kneading. Which is best, as I am a coughing machine. I don't think my family needs my germs.


Isn't the color nice? Like caramel. Next, I buttered the loaf pan and poured the batter into the pan.



Two quick sidenotes: First, that loaf pan used to have various baked-on stains that I thought were there for life. I took the pan to my grandparents' house for Thanksgiving a few years ago, and my grandfather returned it to me in pristine condition. He is a miracle worker. Or obsessive-compulsive. Maybe a little bit of both. Second, the guy who wrote the recipe on Simply Recipes strongly urges you to fill the pan no more than 2/3 of the way to the top. Please believe him. Or else you will end up with this after you bake the bread for 50 minutes in a 350 degree oven:




And you should see the bottom of the oven. Anyway, I brushed the loaf with melted butter, and hacked off a hunk.


The verdict?


It's a very flavorful bread-- I think I'll try it with a lighter beer next time. The writer suggested trying it with Harp's. But, it was very good. And so, so very easy-- took about 15 minutes from start to finish, and that was with the photo breaks. And it smells lovely. In closing, the loaf was a success. I shall end with a picture of my child.


The end.

The Atrocity-March 2009

OK, so Sara and I couldn’t agree on a loaf idea. Well, we could agree on what type of loaf, but not on how to make it happen. So we went our separate ways on the loaves. I went back to this idea which has been rolling around in my head for some time. (Actually, it may have been Sara’s idea to begin with as well, but I don’t want to blame her for that) So I decided to go ahead and create this “canned-meat-aspic” thing. It would be layers of different meats with different hues. Simple enough. I could make a loaf that was both revolting and intriguing. I could learn a little about aspics, and layering. No one would be expected to actually eat it. It would be fun. What harm could it do?What I’ve created is now being called “that abomination before god”…has a slightly different ring than “canned-meat –aspic”, or the short-lived “Vikng-boat-loaf”. I mean, I knew it was going to be bad…

Sara gave me the idea of making a boat out of the canned meats, and that’s what I attempted. As I said, I knew it was going to be bad. My first inkling came with the first layer. Nothing fancy at all here. I just wanted a blue bit of sea for the Viking boat to ride on. So, I lined a loaf pan with parchment paper and set about the task. Now, even though I knew no one would actually eat this loaf, I wanted to pretend that it could be eaten. It had to have flavor, so I used chicken stock for first layer:

1 cup chicken stock

1 packet Knox unflavored gelatine

6 drops blue food coloring

It’s been awhile since I’ve worked with chicken stock. The smell alone of the cold chicken juice made me pause a little. The smell of lukewarm, blue, chicken broth was almost too much to bear. Then, you know just for fun, throw in some ground up cartilage, hooves, and skin. It took a little effort to not lose it there. I got over it, and the gelatin set up nicely. Next came the mold portion for the boat. I used an old rarebit for the mold and it took a few layers with varying amounts of food coloring to get the mold just right. I put Crisco on the rarebit, so pulling it from the gelatin was easy. By this time I’ve spent about 45 minutes on the dish, plus several hours of gelling time. Night comes and the remainder of the dish is put off to tomorrow.

Next came the assembly of the boat. Spam served at the majority of the hull. With potted meat being spread over like icing to mask deck inconsistencies. Vienna sausages were sliced in half and used as a railing for the ship. By this point I had quit using chicken stock. Mostly because it wasn’t not clear enough, but also because I couldn’t handle the smell. I also stopped adding food coloring for clarity.

By this time it was obvious that this in now way was going to look like a Viking ship. Hell, I’m not even really sure what a Viking ship looks like. So, in an effort to make sure everyone knew this was a ship (Viking? Pirate? Sunken?) a small treasure chest was crafted from spare Vienna sausage. A little yellow food coloring and some mustard seeds became the treasure. Most of the treasure became scattered across the deck when the next layer of gelatin was poured on. I imagine that’s pretty realistic, the seas can be rough.

Well, it’s still obvious that this doesn’t look like a ship EVEN with the treasure chest. A mast and sail are definitely in order. I have nothing to make a mast from. I am forced to go out a purchase a slim-jim.

The slim-jim mast actually looks go od. I mean, it actually looks similar to wood. A sail is fashioned from a thin piece of spam. The final layer of gela tin is added. Th e m ast and sail are too tall for the

mold. They stick up above the final layer. This is definitely now a sunken treasure ship. OK, it’s actually just a mound of processed meat in some chicken flavored and unflavored gelatin.









The unmolding was actually pretty e asy. The side views are hard to see, but that’s what I get for using chicken stock and food coloring. Plus, I’m not sure we need to see it any better

r.

The Atrocity-March 2009

OK, so Sara and I couldn’t agree on a loaf idea. Well, we could agree on what type of loaf, but not on how to make it happen. So we went our separate ways on the loaves. I went back to this idea which has been rolling around in my head for some time. (Actually, it may have been Sara’s idea to begin with as well, but I don’t want to blame her for that) So I decided to go ahead and create this “canned-meat-aspic” thing. It would be layers of different meats with different hues. Simple enough. I could make a loaf that was both revolting and intriguing. I could learn a little about aspics, and layering. No one would be expected to actually eat it. It would be fun. What harm could it do?What I’ve created is now being called “that abomination before god”…has a slightly different ring than “canned-meat –aspic”, or the short-lived “Vikng-boat-loaf”. I mean, I knew it was going to be bad…

Sara gave me the idea of making a boat out of the canned meats, and that’s what I attempted. As I said, I knew it was going to be bad. My first inkling came with the first layer. Nothing fancy at all here. I just wanted a blue bit of sea for the Viking boat to ride on. So, I lined a loaf pan with parchment paper and set about the task. Now, even though I knew no one would actually eat this loaf, I wanted to pretend that it could be eaten. It had to have flavor, so I used chicken stock for first layer:

1 cup chicken stock

1 packet Knox unflavored gelatine

6 drops blue food coloring

It’s been awhile since I’ve worked with chicken stock. The smell alone of the cold chicken juice made me pause a little. The smell of lukewarm, blue, chicken broth was almost too much to bear. Then, you know just for fun, throw in some ground up cartilage, hooves, and skin. It took a little effort to not lose it there. I got over it, and the gelatin set up nicely. Next came the mold portion for the boat. I used an old rarebit for the mold and it took a few layers with varying amounts of food coloring to get the mold just right. I put Crisco on the rarebit, so pulling it from the gelatin was easy. By this time I’ve spent about 45 minutes on the dish, plus several hours of gelling time. Night comes and the remainder of the dish is put off to tomorrow.

Next came the assembly of the boat. Spam served at the majority of the hull. With potted meat being spread over like icing to mask deck inconsistencies. Vienna sausages were sliced in half and used as a railing for the ship. By this point I had quit using chicken stock. Mostly because it wasn’t not clear enough, but also because I couldn’t handle the smell. I also stopped adding food coloring for clarity.

By this time it was obvious that this in now way was going to look like a Viking ship. Hell, I’m not even really sure what a Viking ship looks like. So, in an effort to make sure everyone knew this was a ship (Viking? Pirate? Sunken?) a small treasure chest was crafted from spare Vienna sausage. A little yellow food coloring and some mustard seeds became the treasure. Most of the treasure became scattered across the deck when the next layer of gelatin was poured on. I imagine that’s pretty realistic, the seas can be rough.

Well, it’s still obvious that this doesn’t look like a ship EVEN with the treasure chest. A mast and sail are definitely in order. I have nothing to make a mast from. I am forced to go out a purchase a slim-jim.

The slim-jim mast actually looks go od. I mean, it actually looks similar to wood. A sail is fashioned from a thin piece of spam. The final layer of gela tin is added. Th e m ast and sail are too tall for the

mold. They stick up above the final layer. This is definitely now a sunken treasure ship. OK, it’s actually just a mound of processed meat in some chicken flavored and unflavored gelatin.









The unmolding was actually pretty e asy. The side views are hard to see, but that’s what I get for using chicken stock and food coloring. Plus, I’m not sure we need to see it any better

r.

Red Lentil Loaf-March 2009

Inspired by the "Red Lentil Balls" we get at our local farmer's market, I thought I could make something like that in loaf form. We surreptitiously wrote down the ingredients on the label at the market, bought a box of them - and promptly discovered the ingredients list on the back of the package :) So, I knew what was in them, but didn't know how much, but I played and came up with the following recipe:

• 3/4c red lentils (+ 1 1/2 c water)
• 1/2 Tbs tomato paste
• 1/3 c cracked wheat (+2/3 c salted water)
• 1 tsp olive oil (+1/2 tsp)
• 1 bunch of fresh chives, chopped
  
• juice of 1/2 lemon
• 1/8 tsp salt

Combine lentils, tomato paste and water. Bring to a boil, cover, and simmer for ~15 minutes (until lentils are done). At the same time, combine the cracked wheat and water, bring to a boil, cover and simmer for 5-10 minutes until done. Drain the cracked wheat.



Combine lentils and cracked wheat in a bowl. Add 1 tsp olive oil, fresh chives, lemon juice and salt, mix well.
** A little note about fresh chives**

Watch out for the fire ants!!!!

Line a loaf pan with cling wrap and brush with olive oil. Spread lentil mixture into pan, smooth and brush top with oil, then cover with the extra cling wrap. Place in fridge for 2-4 hrs.

Take loaf out of the fridge, unwrap the top of the clingwrap, and turn the loaf pan over onto a plate...
Then, you see you need a sauce! So....

1/4 c cilantro, chopped
1/3 c plain yogurt
juice of 1/2 lemon
a dash of Tony Chachere's seasoning

Combine all ingredients until well mixed. Then, realize that Pitas would be AWESOME with this, along with some fresh, organic Pac Choy from the Farmers' Market and do something like this






But does it taste good?...........................

That's a Yes!!!


Sedge, however, found it a bit less than appealing (he's only had red lentils warm)....



All in all, lots of fun, and now I have a new and fairly easy spring/summer dinner for us to enjoy!